What if Metallica went into Java programming?

May 27, 2021 by Michael

Yesterday, Maciej shared this and I answered

after that, things escalated a bit… 🙂

While I thought, if Metallica would have been Spring developers, they would have written about Disposable Beans, not Heroes, other people have been more creative:

From Gerald came songs about memory leaks or the lack thereof: Creeping Death (Memory Leak) or The Memory Remains (no Memory Leak).
Java is a managed manage, so of course there’s the garbage collection with Harvester of Garbage. We have (at least 3 boolean values), which is Sad But True (Boxed Booleans).
Anyway, there’s seems to be a running thread… well, Until it Sleeps. If there are some weak references, they thought I Disappear.

Most important bit however is Coffee in the Jar.

Mario chimed in as well and pointed out to the One singleton, the less friendly garbage collector named Seek and Destroy. I would have said that this one pulls The Shortest Straw for you, but that one also applies to a Comparable. In the end, Nothing else matters anyway, while jitting the hot path.

Christoph being the awesome Spring developer he is, brought up of course The Master Of Beans as well as The Bean Within. Everything has a beginning and the end, and so have beans: Init & Destroy.

My favorite one however came from dear Eirini: The bean that should not be, which sums up some struggles of setting up some projects where nicely 🙂

The twitter thread made my day, some light heartened fun for a change.

Have some fun while listening to the songs above:

Featured image on the post from Wikimedia commons under a Creative Commons license.

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